Clarified

"You may not write well every day, but you can always edit a bad page. You can't edit a blank page." - Jodi Picoult

It's been awhile but I thought with my next book coming up to be released, it might be time to start posting some more one shot writing pieces to my blog. Here's one I wrote awhile ago involving a fictional character.

Notes: Joey Maverick is a fictional character created for a Harry Potter RP site, Inside New Hogwarts (https://insidenewhogwarts.proboards.com). During this scene, Joey is dealing with unrequited feelings for his best friend Corvus that he hasn't recognized he even has as well as being annoyed by his sister's best friend locking lips with another as well. He's majorly confused and running back to his inappropriate ex-boyfriend.

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Joey didn't understand his reaction to Liwei kissing Corvus. Beau mentioned jealousy but that was NOT it at all. Was he attracted to Corvus? Yes, but they were best friends. There was nothing more in question. As he turned to leave, another, similar, feeling caught him by surprise and crushed his heart until his chest hurt. The sight of Sungwon locked in an intimate embrace with... Someone, he couldn't tell who threw him off balance. Just days ago the guy had expressed his interest in Joey, and Joey had shot him down. Did everyone's hearts bounce back so easily to except his? Was Joey the abnormality who clung to the past heartache and used it as a shield to avoid falling and the inevitable pain that came with love?

"I'll see ya, Beau," Joey ditched the younger Slytherin.

He headed for the house, straight to the basement where the rum was stored. He took a bottle out and had a long drink from it before carrying it with him out the basement exit.

Joey wasn't quite sure where he was going but he stumbled along the sand and rocky road with his bottle until he reached the marina. The usual twenty minutes took longer as he stopped to drink from the bottle and stumble here and there. His steps were slower than normal but he eventually reached his destination.

The small boat hadn't changed as Joey climbed aboard, only losing his footing once. The distinct smell of tobacco made his stomach churn but told him someone was home. He banged on the door once he was on deck. No one answered. He banged louder.

"Haydar! I know you're in there," his words slurred. "I can smell your pipe smoke! Open the door!"

It took a few minutes, and Joey could hear movement behind the door. It swung open revealing a handsome, dark-haired man with a five o'clock shadow. He wore just track pants and looked better than Joey remembered. The usual happened then. The thoughts he'd been determined to lay on Haydar fell from his mind as he stared.

"Joey Maverick..." the older man said his name with his thick accent that melted Joey's resolve. "Are you drunk, ya amar?"

"Shut up!" Joey snapped. "You were a terrible boyfriend!"

"Why are you here?"

Why was he there? To yell? To vent? To give Haydar a piece of his mind? None of those things happened. What did happen surprised both of them. Joey reached for Haydar, taking a firm and dominant step forward, and pulled in. Their lips pressed hard together in an unexpected kiss that did not last very long but long enough to taste the tobacco on his lips before Joey released him.

"I thought you quit?" Joey questioned.

"I lied," Haydar pulled Joey back in for another heated, aggressive kiss.

Joey was pulled into the cabin and kicked the door shut behind him.

SOMETIME LATER

Laying there, breathless, in a bed he'd frequented many times before, actually left Joey feeling satisfied and empty. While it had been the best they'd had together, it didn't make him feel better. If anything, he felt worse for being so weak to come back to a man who cared so little about him before and wouldn't begin to care about him now. He stared at the ceiling with his fingers drumming on his bare chest, contemplating the best way to make a graceful exit from his ex-boyfriend's boat.

An arm tightened around his middle and a face appeared above him, propped up on an elbow. "Wow... I don't usually take the submissive role for anyone, but for you, ya amar, I will any day. Who the hell have you been shagging at that fancy school of yours?"

Joey glared at him. When Haydar lowered himself down to kiss him, Joey shoved him away and sat up. He began looking for the remains of his clothing scattered around the floor.

"Don't call me that. I'm not your moon, I'm not your anything," he snapped. The ugly feelings he still held from the party were not forgotten and he was taking them out on the man laying behind him in the bed. He found his pants, still with the underwear tucked into them, and pulled them on.

He once thought this was love. That the immense attraction he had for Haydar, and how willing he was to do anything to make the man happy was love. It might have been for Joey. He'd been completely smitten with the older man. It was not love for Haydar. Joey knew that. Even knowing that, he still felt compelled to ask the question that weighed heavily on his mind, like he needed confirmation.

"Did you care about me at all?" Joey turned to face him. "Because I can't figure out why some twenty-two-year-old, gorgeous person like you who could be with anyone would waste the summer on some fifteen-year-old and risk getting arrested..."

"Do you want the truth? Is that why you're here? Because you're pissed off at me and the world or some bullshit?"

"Yes. I want the truth," Joey crossed his arms over his bare chest and stared Haydar down.

"You were so cute. Every day you sat on the edge of the rail and watched me with such an intent stare. You'd blush every time I invited you down to join us but you never did. Then when I finally got you alone it was like I couldn't resist. I just had to have you."

"So, it was completely physical?"

"In the beginning, yes."

"Why did you stay?"

"I like sex, and you were so easy. So naive and stupid, you believed everything I said."

Anger flared inside of him. He clenched his fist and then released it. Janie would have hit Haydar, but Joey didn't have the same temper. Instead, he grabbed his shirt and threw it over his head. "For what it's worth, I loved you." Joey stalked to the door and yanked it open. He paused. "And you're a terrible top."